young love.

sometimes when we talk about young love.
the thought of highschool /college crush monkey love will usually come to mind.

of late night texting.
of lovey dovey emoticons.
of cute pink (or blue) letters hidden under the school desk (awaiting to be found by the disciplinary teacher)
of going to cinemas at 11 in the morning and having Mcd for lunch
and not to mention . . .

of those tornado with a slight pinch of typical soap drama fights (most of the time)

yup.
that crossed most of our minds (well at least mine) amongst many others when we talk about 'young love'.
ah . . .
those were the days .
of claiming hormonal imbalance and immaturity as LOVE .
yes.

the young love.

however.
NOW
as i am leaving that phase of life. (probably have left)
not being too mindful to realise.
that.

love itself has been redefined.
subconsciously.

just in few more months .
i am soon to be someone's other half. (insyaAllah) .
and as i reevaluate my thoughts and feelings.
i have come to a point of understanding.
that 'hey!. probably that familiar 'young love' i have come to known. has grown  so much to become a 'mature love' a lady or a gentleman of its own  '

of simply wanting to  be selfless in spite of  being given the opportunity to choose selfishness. 
of making sure. that happiness could only be attained when the other party is happy.
of simply knowing that.
this time around.
you don't love just to be loved.
but you love.
because you want to love.

and it dawned on me much.
that.
i don't need to overly parade tantrum . dissatisfaction nor disappointment to be heard.
and i don't need to put the 'no i am not apologising' cue up.
because.
those emotions pass by only in brief seconds.
and you let it go .
because you know.
that's the right thing to do.
and when you do something .
its only for the sake of knowing that you are loving another being of Allah.
and that should be enough as a reward.

so.
as days pass by.
as nearing the time .
hidden tears of complete selflessness.
and of hidden smiles of complete willingness.

'young love' seems further than the reach of the hand.

truthfully.

i don't know whether i can ever be a Khadijah to a Muhammad.
but one thing for sure . i will try to be a Nurul to a someone.

insyaAllah.

may He reward me with what is best for me.

and for others out there too. 
:)