here and there.now and later.

day 15.

crit.
spare me mercy.
because i really want today to be nice.

and.
i dont mind if you'r busy chasing life.i'll still adore you.

but remember.
we have two lives.here and there.now and later.
just make sure you pick the right one.

happy thursday everyone :)

Timo Räisänen -about you now

for all.

speak.laugh.hug.

half of day 14.

i miss speaking.
speaking to them.

i miss laughing.
laughing with them.

i miss hugging.
hugging them.

so mom and dad.are you ready to speak to.laugh with.and hug with.me.for another 9 days to come?
cause i am. :)

lesson for today.speak.laugh and hug.in that order.u'll find that the world loves u too.
and your parents.are on top of the list.
happy almost ending wednesday everyone. :)

right.

day 14

studio still.

i give up.can i?

give up on work and love.

but...should i?

i chased love half a decade.why can't love chase me back now?
i might just stop.as to this day.this minute.this second.

or...maybe.just maybe.i am again blinded by the fanciness of the world.overwhelmed by its pseudo happiness.
until.i lost the meaning of grateful and chase blindly over amiss aim of life itself.

so no Neb.you do not give up.you do not stop.just find the right path for the right finishing line.
and smile while you're at it :)

i know and i dont.

end of day 13

i dont know what may come.
i dont know what might not come.
i dont know what you think.
i dont know what you feel.

but

i know i aim the best to what may come
i know i accede to all His decisions
i know what i think
i know what i feel

and I will leave it to You.
Because if its not You.who else should i turn to.

what is life if its wasted.with not loving.and being loved back.

half

day 13.

you changed my mood.and i dont like that.

but half of today.i realised.you have no right.so half of today.i am not affected by your actions.of your abysmal attitude.

you value not love. so you get non in return.not from me that is.

so half of today.
i am infuriated.
and another half.
i am happy.
i will get the right one.i know.

so today.
people.
dont let anyone affect your happiness.because its not from them you get it.its from God.

7 things and only 1 that matters.

end of day 12.

today i am scared.
scared of what might happen.
scared that things i want will turn out to be things i'll regret wanting.
scared of ever finding love and losing it again.
scared of believing lies.
scared of knowing the truth.
scared of loving now and not being loved back later.
and most of all..

scared of God Himself.

show me how to not be scared for the 7 things above.and show me how to always be scared for that One above.

merely words.

almost end of day 12.

loyalty
faithfulness
devotion
allegiance
trustworthiness
constancy
reliability
fidelity

what are all those words mean.if we don't practice it.
even towards humans we are not accustomed to it.how can we be towards God?

loyalty worth more than all the undivided gold in the world.

single.

day 12

things to do in single day in single word

essay
essay
essay
model
eat
sketch
essay
and..

smile...

don't let life catch u.catch it.and tame it.and have fun with it.
happy Monday to all :)

Today

Day 11

Alive and glad.
Back sooner than I can count.
I miss those familiar faces.
And I miss your face.friend.
And I am glad.it's your face that I miss.

Will make a point one day.just one day.

Today.I love you.

Birth.

end of day 10

Birthdays.date for gifts and celebrations.
Along the way of many years.we forget.the gift that matters most,is the gift from that one that matters most.
God.The gift of life.

So to all that matters today.thank you God for making them alive.
The best gift for them and for me.

Happy Birthday people I know. :)

good girl

day 10.

lovely morning.right side of bed again. i love this love feeling of loving everything :)

shall restrain myself.shall.

mechanical love.

day 9.

thankful.

if i can't give my love to the livings..can i give it to machines?

cold.long.tiring.effort.paid off.and i have only one to thank.God.

yes.i am.

end of day 8.

yes.i am in love.

with the grass.the sky.the wind.and the sun.

and yes.i am in love.

with nature and what is within me.

let us all not categorise love.because my love.towards all is the same.and i am happy nontheless if nature is the only thing i will ever love.and that loves me back.

i am not a beggar for humans' love.but i do beg for God's love.

today.

day 8.

unfinished design.

calm inner self.

let it be a great start and the best ending.

and yes.

end of day 7.

a great day.and an old habit that needs to be stopped.i will try.harder.

and yes.God.i am happy today.without needing a reason.i just am.

thank you.

and yes.God.i am in love today.without asking for a return love.i just will.

thank you.

tubes and straws.

day 7.
having fun with myself.my inner self.

something i noticed.happiness varies.

and mine.is the best i have ever had in many years.

if i could channel this.with tubes and straws.i'll share it to the whole world.

God.i'm inlove with you.

indeed

end of day 6.

tired.but its good tired.

a peaceful day indeed.and i still miss you.very much.

i shared this blog today.not to brag.but to share thoughts.because we all need company.even with words.so if you're reading.anyone.anywhere.my words are with you.

be happy.the world needs you to. :)

a beautiful view.to view.

greatness in life is not measured by what you achieved.but how happy you get when you have achieved it.

graceful

day 6.

i do not jump.i float.and when i land.i land gracefully.

i.will.wait.

needs and wants

day 5.

class.i need to go.
strength.i need to have.
you.i want to love.

if?

almost end of day 4.

i know i miss someone.but i do not know who.
or maybe i know.and i can't do anything.

loving in silence is better than not loving at all.
or maybe.it's not.

if it is not true.it will go.but what if.just what if..its true.
then.where do i stand?

The Love Language - 'Heart To Tell'

a short but long life.

day 4.of nothingness.

cough.go away.

somebody passed away.somebody i do not know.but i am sad.how life can be so short yet so long.
i do not know why.he is a stranger.and how can a stranger make you sad?but a stranger can be even closer than you can ever be to yourself.it is just that we are too occupied with life.to see.or know it.

if i can appreciate a stranger.somebody that i have never even met or known of his existence.i want and i can appreciate those people that are close to me.

i love you dear mom and dad.
i love you dear siblings.
i love you dear family.
i love you dear friends.
and i love you dear boy.

i will

day 3 of a thousand days to come.i hope.

i woke up with a hope.and ended up with a crushed hope.it's ok.i'll wait for another day.i'll be fine.i know i will.someway.somehow.

there's going to be a day.where sick is not a vocabulary for me to use anymore.i'll be patient.i'll try.

i am angry
angry that i wasted half a decade for a guy who finds love not less than a week.
and
i am not upset.
because that half a decade love will not be more than half a decade.
and
i am glad
because falling in love makes you a whole new person.a better one i hope.and let it be this time.with a different guy.

never change.

ending of day 2.

i wanted to smile.and i did.and i thank you for that. :)

ill.

day 2.
ill.that is what i am.
lost.that is what i am.

even a thousand bad dreams given.i still accept sleep.

i miss you.

are you me and am i you?

day 1 of a promising 100 days to come.
i am sick.and i know i will get well.but im not patient.i never was.am.and will be.
my mind is filled with thoughts that i myself do not know.
and my heart is still a very unfamiliar organ.

i do not know what i want in life.what i expect from life.i am a floating leaf.and it seems.its always windy in my world.
i have become more critical of life.and i take a step back before stepping forward.tempted to get hurt but scared of the pain.
these eyes made me view world in a very different way now.and this heart does not tally to what i see.
i wake up in a different position.
i eat in a different manner
i talk for a different purpose
i laugh and smile for a different reason
and i love differently towards a different person.

so day 1.who am i?