of 20ft container and the community.

'ease others and your Lord will ease you'

this came across my thought as i was walking back from an open house by a postgrad yesterday.

i have to admit.
i am someone who finds it really hard to open my mouth and seek help.

i don't know whether it is the ego or whether it is the shyness.
but i always find it hard 
to simply ask for help. (unless if the person is really.really.really.close to me)
especially from a stranger.

i guess apart of me fear rejection.
and the disappointment of not getting any if i seek it.
so everytime when i need one.
i resorted to just struggle on my own first.
and then only.i will hide behind others and let them ask for me.

and before this i didn't really take note of how much i avoid the conversation of
'eh awak. awak boleh tolong saya?' or simply.
'do you mind doing this.and this for me?'

until yesterday.
when i realised.
i am going to need as much help as possible.
when the 20ft container arrives.

so as usual.
i push others to ask others for help.
because in my mind.
if i were to be the one asking for it.
i will be the major cause of their burden.
and that thought is very much uncomfortable for me to bare. alone.
(probably this is the reason why i don't fancy having maids. it'll be too awkward to ask them do anything)

but.
as a friend was asking around.
'eh.siapa boleh tolong neb angkat barang dia and kitaorang punya nanti?'

a rush of  fear filled me.
out of a sudden.
*tah apa-apa tah*

and there i was.
to my surprise.
they answered yes.and offered even more.

ah.
and in fact suggested to help cook for the day.
because trust me.
probably they read my expression well.
cooking for 20 other people would be the most horrific nightmare a neb could have.
yes. i hereby proclaim.
i am not good in serving big crowds.

and so.
i am awoken to a forgotten thought.
the key to great community .

hablum minnannas.

your balance relationship with the creations.

and without me realising it.
every time when we seek help.
we are not simply burdening the person.
but we are actually opening a door for them to be closer to Allah.
and that happens only if we do it for the sake of Allah.

and trust me.
i have nothing to offer them back.
besides a truck load of gratitude.
yet.
they are willing to help us still.
such great community i am living with .
Alhamdullilah.

may the filling of the  20ft container be easy.
and may Allah count their every sweat later in helping.

and. . . . .

may i put my shyness or probably ego a little aside.
next time.
because hey!
wouldn't it be nice to be the reason of someone else's chance to add up his/her good deeds.
and wouldn't it be nice to be the one getting it too.


dah.
tak payah nak malu-malu sangat tak kena tempat neb.
tak macho.
booooooooooo.